One

Today I relized I am; and there was nothing I could do about it. I am sick. I am sick because of the people who are next to me. I have been to the doctor and they dont know what is wrong with me. I can see a guidance counsellor but lets faces it they dont know whats wrong with me either. I can write letters but what good would those do if they are not read. I could set boundaries but when they get crossed what purpose do they serve. I can love and forgive and forget but how will that acutally help me. I could relax but how is that possible in this century. I can express how i truely feel and what I NEED but when no one cares what will it prove. It proved something to me. It proves that I am and there nothing I can do about it. I do not have control of my life. My body is physically, emoionally and mentally revolting against me; and what can i do? Nothing; because i am; and there's nothing I can do about it.